In the cold light of day, it can be argued England beat the teams they should have beaten anyway.
The Gabba is an eighth defeat in England’s past 15 Tests. Away from home they have lost 10 in 14. There has been no win in a five-Test series against Australia or India. If it feels harsh to use a 4-1 defeat in India at the beginning of last year as part of the judgement, India have recently lost 3-0 at home to New Zealand and 2-0 to South Africa.
The Bazball empire is now at risk of capitulation. Pre-series, it felt like defeat in Australia would not necessarily necessitate change, depending on the manner of performance.
Losing 3-2 after a decider in Sydney is vastly different to losing 3-2 after being 3-0 down. England could still win (yes, I know). They could also lose 5-0.
Stokes and McCullum both have contracts until the end of the next home Ashes in 2027. Rob Key manages them both. England and Wales Cricket Board chief executive Richard Gould and chairman Richard Thompson will take the temperature of public reaction – currently boiling hot.
Beyond the management, there are careers and reputations of players on the line. One wonders what they are saying in the dressing room.
Is there enough honesty and maturity to hold one another to account? Is there space in the Bazball groupthink to suggest there might be another way of doing things?
In the aftermath of the Gabba defeat, the comments of Stokes and McCullum were as strong as they have been in their three-plus years in charge. The two alphas publicly questioning the mentality of the England team is something that could come back to haunt them later in the tour.
“A dressing room that I am captain of is not a place for weak men,” said Stokes.
Bar dragging in rookies from the England Lions – who are getting hammered by Australia A – England will have to rely on this group of players to salvage something from the tour.
England have not brought a specialist back-up keeper, so Smith is likely to remain in the firing line. There is no reserve specialist opener. The back-up batter, Jacob Bethell, has pretty much been on a gap year, but at least made 71 for the Lions on Sunday.
When a spinner is needed for the third Test in Adelaide, Australia can call on Nathan Lyon’s 562 Test wickets. England will have to gamble on Bashir, chosen off the back of a clip on social media and currently without a county contract. His figures for the Lions were 0-115.
There is more than a week until that third Test, time when England will have to justify their holiday on the Sunshine Coast.
When they return from their jollies, they will have the task of keeping the Ashes alive past Christmas.
Fail, and it would be hard to argue this is not England’s worst Ashes tour of modern times.
